What's in the Space, Timing, and the Why

“Every day, in every way, I’m getting better and better.”- Émile Coué

I’m a big believer in affirmations, the power of the word, our ability to co-create our lives, and the idea that we create our reality. But I’ve often wondered why it seems to work for some people and not for others. We all have the power to create and come from the same Source energy, so why does it seem easier for some than for others?

Over the years, I came to a few realizations, and they began to clarify the pattern for me.

The first thing I realized is that sometimes we have to sort through what is already occupying the space. What is in my mind? What beliefs do I hold about myself? What beliefs do I hold about why I don’t have the things I desire? What stories am I carrying?

Many years ago, I took part in a training program where we shared parts of our lives that were still hurting, and how we showed up for ourselves. I realized that what was hurting us wasn’t so much what happened, but the story we created about it.

We made the story the reality.

When we separated what happened from the story we created around it, something shifted. There was space for something new to emerge.

And when there is space, we can create something new.

I think sometimes affirmations “don’t work” not because they aren’t powerful, but because they compete with stories and beliefs that have been formed over time. We can say, “I am worthy,” but if a deeper story says otherwise, we have to look at where it came from and begin dismantling it.

Sometimes the work isn’t just about creating something new. Sometimes it is about clearing what has been taking up the space.

But I also want to say that it is not always because something is in the way. Sometimes it is about timing. Sometimes we are not ready yet. Sometimes we have not matured into the person who can hold what we are asking for. We may need to create the proper space to receive what is coming.

It reminds me of the teaching about not putting new wine into old wineskins. The old container cannot always hold what is new, so the space has to be prepared for the new to come in and fully exist.

The second thing I think is important to ask is whether this is something I came to do.

And I’m not saying you can’t change what you want to do or create a different path. We are creators. But I think it is a valid question to ask: Is what I am trying to create or manifest aligned with my journey?

And the third thing is asking the big why. Why do I want this? Why is it important to me? Sometimes we discover that the thing we are trying to manifest is not really about the thing itself. It is about what we believe that thing will bring us. What is it that I really want? Is it peace, joy, freedom, love, or feeling seen and valued?

Sometimes, when we go deeper, we realize the desire is pointing us toward something much bigger than what we thought we wanted.

For me, the question has always been about understanding the why. If I haven’t reached a particular place in my life, what is on my mind? What is happening in my life? What is preventing me from moving into the next place?

Again, I don’t believe the answer is always that something is blocking us. Sometimes it is simply that we are becoming. Sometimes we are being prepared.

At the end of the day, I think the big why matters. When we understand the why, we know whether to clear the space, prepare for timing, or align with our journey. And when we understand ourselves, we create from a much deeper place.