Stop Chasing & Know Your Worth 💎

I think time and time again people are chasing validation and attention because of lack of inner self-worth. This usually stems from somewhere in family dynamics or even social dynamics where you felt you were not good enough. So instead, you are constantly chasing validation and attention in relationships, public spaces, work, friendships, lovers all of the above. But you’re the only one who can know you are WORTHY.

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I know this because I was once in this mind frame, wondering if something was wrong with me. But as I’ve gotten older in my 30’s, I have come to realize that nothing is wrong with me. And that is why I am here to tell you today nothing is wrong with you either, but I have to say this until you realize it internally for yourself, you might keep chasing unhealthy connections and keep hoping for signs. And I am not saying signs aren’t real, because I believe they are there, but most of the time they are pointing back to YOU.

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You might tell yourself you’re just being consistent, showing up, or trying your best but the truth is, most people aren’t fully aware of their own patterns in real time. And without awareness, it’s easy to stay stuck in cycles without realizing it. Self-awareness takes time, and it starts with noticing where your energy is actually going. One simple practice is to pause before you give more, more time, more energy, more explanation, and ask yourself if it is mutual or if it is coming from a need to be seen.

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It even shows up online, in how people start performing for attention, likes, responses, or engagement, thinking that if they just do a little more, post a little better, say the right thing, then they will finally feel acknowledged. But it becomes a cycle of doing more and still feeling unseen. A helpful practice is noticing when you are posting from expression versus posting from the need for validation.

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You might think posting more or overgiving in connection will make you liked, but really you’re depleting your own sacred energy, energy meant for you, and for those who actually show up for you in the same way.

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But until you’re ready, if ever, external validation won’t carry much weight when your internal world is grounded. One way to begin this grounding is by gently pulling your energy back in moments where you notice you are overextending, and observing what remains when you are not performing for connection.